BPD month and raising awareness... please please read and share

This month is BPD (borderline personality disorder) awareness month, and being someone who suffers from this I know how important it is to raise awareness and get rid of the stigma of a 'personality disorder'.
Although not as widely known as bipolar disorder it is actually a much more common illness, there are many people out there who are extremely judgemental and promote hatred towards BPD suffers, just look at youtube. But if they even tried to understand a bit of the hell it is having BPD, we do have our ups and downs just extreme, if you think its hard coping with a person with constant rapid extreme mood swings try  and imagine how it feels to be having them. You spend your days on an emotional rollercoaster unable to make sense of your own emotions, its chaos inside your head and you can't think. When you get angry it feels like an uncontrollable rage, and when you feel low you just wanna die. Self harm is common amongst those with BPD, its an outlet a way to make us feel real to release the pain inside, it just hurts so much and you feel unworthy of love, alone, you feel like you are such an evil person that doesn't deserve to live or be happy. Those who have severe tendency to depression like me, you can have delusions of paranoia and hear voices telling you that you are evil, selfish, you don't deserve to be happy and that everyone would be happier if you died, nobody cares about you. You don't see a future its just a dark emptyness. We see how we hurt people and that only worsens how we feel, we lash out one minute then pray you don't leave us the next. The way we act is not intentional to hurt and be manipulative, we hurt so much inside you just can't see how broken we are.

Having BPD is like a death sentence half the doctors don't care and can't be bothered to help us because it's a hard job, but those Bipolar are treated quickly and cared for while we suffer in silence. BPD is like bipolar but the mood changes are more extreme and last minutes to hours not weeks to months.

If you read this please help spread awareness, and support our cause

I'm lucky I have friends who support me and am on pretty strong meds but am still waiting for treatment more than a year after I was put on the waiting list as urgent ....

please click to buy wristbands to help personality disorder support!

Shades of grey!

Tasha xxx

Back on youtube!

ok so I've finally got around to getting back on youtube, my channel basically videos linked to this blog so check it out subscribe or whatever your heart desires! and the lack of recent posts is due to exams in the next couple weeks and me being ill

xxx

Viva Glam by Nicki Minaj and Mac

swatch
top - mac satin lipstick in viva glam Nicki
bottom - E.L.F lip liner (and blending brush in pink grapefruit)

Right - with lipliner
left - without lipliner
(excuse my bad skin having a wee breakout)

So I finally managed to get into town today to purchase the new Viva Glam lipstick by Nicki Minaj, after first seeing the advert on the Mac website. To coincide with the release of this limited edition lipstick Rick Martin has also teamed up with Mac to create a lip conditioner. The actual lipstick is £13.50 which I would usually say is expensive but as the full RRP minus VAT goes to help those living with HIV and AIDS, (£10.25 goes to the charity from just one lipstick). I was especially excited about this Nicki Minaj shade, as I adore her make-up which is always bright, fun and Barbie like, the lipstick itself is a lovely creamy texture with a mild scent which is actually pretty nice the colour on the other hand is a really nice shade of pink which would go with most skin tones. The colour is pretty close to the lip liner in a previous post which i got from E.L.F in grapefruit, with the lipliner the colour comes out stronger and more 'pink' than without but either way the colour is vibrant,more so than in the pictures. This is actually my first purchase from MAC and I have to say this particular range is worth the money as not only do you get a lovely lipstick but you are helping those less fortunate.

If you hurry you get the lipstick from debenhams with a small discount with free delivery, or you can get it direct from mac , for the lipliner click on this link E.L.F.

feel free to follow me :) for more regular fashion/make-up stuff I'm still pretty new to this so any support will be great

Tasha xx

Neon satchels - fashion week

All over the recent fashion week people were sporting these ultra bright and cute satchels, neon is in for SS12 and personally I am in love with these little bags!! They will no doubt brighten up a day in the dull, dreary British weather.

They come in a range of sizes with prices ranging from £105 to £120, (from the cambridge satchel company)which I personally think is a pretty decent price for leather bags. If this is out of your budget and you don't fancy saving up for ages slightly cheaper versions can be found at asos and of course Ebay!

I first saw this style of bag in More magazine witch listed new look as the stockist selling the bag for only £9.99! However New look do not sell it, so of course I was disappointed so I will be most definitely be saving up, Probably for a cheaper version though, student budget and all...

E.L.F Mini Haul

Last Friday was the start of a free weekend shipping promotion by E.L.F ( with a min. spend of £10 which would normally only be free if you spend over £35). Being a student with a tight budget I took full advantage of this, seeing as I needed a new kabuki brush anyway. I would really recommend the brushes they do. All of their products are super affordable with must brushes only £1.50, the bristles are really soft and the brushes keep there shape even with frequent washing. I also decided to try their lipliner/blending lip brush combo in grapefruit and I was pleasantly surprised the colour of it, it comes out pretty bright and really soft and creamy :).I also got the eye brighting palate in ethereal, the colours are very close to my skin tone and well be perfect for those days where you want natural eyes but need a wee brighting also the dark brown will be perfect for my eyebrows .

FREE SHIPPING FORM E.L.F

use code BRITLOOKUK for free uk shipping this weekend or BRITLOOKEU for europe :) xx

OOTD

one of my fav comfy outfits :D, I got the knitted cape from Bank for my birthday last year and I adore it, it's perfect for those days were it's too warm for a jacket or when you don't feel like wearing anything very fitted, the black top is from eBay and is such a good buy its a dress/top and is off the shoulder and bat wing great for day or night whether with denim shorts, a skirt or even some tights. The shoes and skirt are old buys from new look, the shoes can be worn 2 ways with the fur round the ankle up or down, the heel folds down and has a small button to hold it. to buy the top/dress costs under £7 :)

xoxo

Topshop/Disney mini haul

I was lucky enough to find out about a promotion love film were doing where you sign up for a free 30 day trial and you get a free £10 Topshop voucher :). Anywhoo I popped into Topshop yesterday looking for a skater skirt and came across the sale and I found a really cool purple skull ring and some cosy gloves which I needed so ended up getting them instead. They only had one ring left in large but for £2.50 I'm not about to complain. It's quite loose on my middle finger but it still looks good and the gloves are really comfy and a great fit and for £3 was a bargain!

While in town I also popped into the disney store because come on who doesn't love disney, and I got the first disney princess charm, this month is Rapunzel. Each month they are bringing out a charm for a different princess to collect. The lovely cashier also gave me a free disney princess wall calander :) which has the dates on which each princess's month starts.

Simbaaaaaa

It being CNY and all its reminding me of my family in Malaysia and the simba my cousin got me I love him soooo much!

iPad/iPhone app!!!

You know those random app searches you do well I searched blog and found this app and it's free pretty cool eh Now it's easier to blog! and don't even need a camera for pics :) if only the camera on this thing was better but hey ho whatcha gonna do

old pics and look from my 21st Birthday dinner

just a basic green smoky eye and purple eye-liner using urban decay. I shouldn't have used flash for the pics, well you do learn from your mistakes

gong xi fat choi!!

So tomorrow is Chinese new year and its the year of the dragon! Gong xi fat choi :) unfortunately I'm not able to spend the new year with my family but I still got my Ang Pow from my mum, for those who don't know what it is its a small red packet with money inside a traditional Chinese new year and wedding present. As its new year I decided to do some nail art, but as I don't have a nail art pen I used toothpicks to do some dragon inspired nails. Done with patience and black design on top of a red base :)

just to start things off...

A kinda dead snow white look I did for halloween, I basically did heavy black eyshadow and liner then went ahead and splashed my face with water and rubbed it about a wee bit to get it messy, then I rubbed some fake blood around my mouth. Needless to say I scared a few people with this :)

xoxo

ermmm

ok so new to this, need to get myself orginised the new term starts in 2 days and I still dunno my timetable eeek!!! But hey ho I need a distraction and do something I love and I love dressing up and doing make-up so soon I will start with looks and reviews and things like that :)
xoxo